IS IT A CRIME “BEING MYSELF!”


                  They say live life your style, but sometimes I feel it becomes a sort of crime, stamping me as a fugitive. Every blessed (I over use this word, I confess m short @ vocab) human being has a right to live life like he wants to live. Man was born free. Then why put him in chains??………………………Even if you put him in chains you can limit the physical movements or rather the gestures but not his ideas and his intellect……………………..And freedom is of no use what so ever, if it doesn’t contain the freedom to err………………….After all, being a human being every one is bound to make mistakes. And moreover, even if someone is asked to limit his thoughts, it’s like almost impossible, you can have alteration and modification in thought but can’t really change the real core or the actual thought, and if you do so, then I can rest assure you that you are not being “yourself”…………………….And for me the glow of one bright thought in my mind is more worthy than 100 dollars.

Aryan, an ordinary boy  belonged to a small place of Kashmir. As a child, he was always jovial, fun loving and someone who lived in his own world. He never cared what the world thought of him, it was like, “I always do what I want to do, what’s the fuss about it!”……………………….He was a day dreamer, loved visualising himself as a HERO in his fantasies…………………..In his dreams he had been the one, Imran Khan gave the bowl to deliver goods in the world cup final of 1992; he also saw himself being crowned as the first MTV ROADIE, instead of Ranvijay ……………..He used to share all his whimsical fantasies only with his family members, may be because he knew that others will call him lunatic, if he told them about his heroics. He was fanatic about cricket and literature since his childhood, loved watching clashes between India and Pakistan and reading reader’s digest(although he was not really able to comprehend the sarcasm in it!)…………………………I guess when you are a day dreamer and carry insatiable desires and wishes, it becomes sort of impossible to accept “the reality”. The reality that you are no-one different, no-one extra talented or extra-gifted; instead you are someone below the average, almost worthless…………………………….

Time went on, Aryan came to a metro for further studies, he never planned or dreamt about it, but he didn’t plan anything else either…………………….It was like “Duniya ke Ishaare pe Nachte jao!”……………………He noticed new things in his life; nobody really cared about him, nobody appreciated him, he was like unnoticed and the worst part of it was he even stopped imagining about his heroics. Although, he found rapture in the materialistic stuff, but that was something temporal or rather ephemeral………………………………….And whenever he wanted to catch-up with the world around him, they bobbed him down, calling him a mere “wannabe!”……………………Aryan was in a sort of dilemma, what to do and what not to do. The real Aryan had diminished and he was never able to fabricate the artificial one!……………….Whenever, he felt down the only thing he did was listening to music and reading……………..

The frustration started brimming; he was not at-ease at all. He couldn’t sleep, talk, concentrate, even music failed to fetch him any sort of tranquillity. He went to the balcony of his flat, looked out and said, “It’s so quiet out here, nobody out, I feel as if I am the only one here!”…………………..It was late night, he looked around no body was out, it was a cold night. The society in which he lived was a sort of Potomac, only so called “high profiles” lived there…………………Aryan was still gazing out, as if he was saying, “I don’t give a bloody fuck man!”……………………….Two strange questions that he had in his mind were-

1-When  I stay original, they hate me……Whenever I say what I want to, they take me wrong and call me impractical and disrespectful!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                              2-And whenever, I try to step in their shoes, they call me “fake” and “wannabe!”

Aryan took a deep breath, and inhaled few puffs of “classic milds”, there was an expression full of agony on his face. He closed his eyes for a few minutes, and then said to himself, “I frame my own rules of survival……..break them at my own leisure ,whims and circumstances…..and reframe them whenever I feel like doing so…………all I know is that tough time never lasts, but tough people do!”…………………………………………….

main bhool jaaun ab yahi munaasib hai
magar bhoolanaa bhi chahoon to kis tarah bhoolaun

bhulaa sakaa na ye silsilaa jo tha hi nahi
vo ek Khayaal
jo aavaaz tak gayaa hii nahi

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7 comments

  1. haqiqat hai..dis ruthless world neither allows us 2 bcom a homogeneous part of d society, nor allows us 2 bcom d heterogeneous part…rather it suffocats d free thinkrs irrespectiv of dere levels n ideas…one more universal fact earned its place (in dis b’ful combination of words n thoughts) which is usually neglected majority of times i.e. when a real man gets frustrated from illogical logics of dis self defined world n steps forward 2 wear d blanket of destruction (suicide), d only think dat comes 2 rescue z d puffing process along wid a music atmosphere…thanx 2 d inventor of cigaratte, or better z d term ‘saviour’ who deflected d strong determination of suicide of uncountable strong persons..keep writing rohan bhai…bahut karra blog!!

  2. absofuckinglutely correct,we are a victim of it. man, who da fuck cares about this effing world. I would say drop this mothafuckin into da ditch. We have done what we wanted and will continue our journey like this.

  3. Now listen man, you’re getting better and better. I love this post! 🙂

    Now like always, i’ll talk about the subject matter first, and then your writing skills. 😛

    We’ve talked endlessly about this, and now you’ve inked it and put forward it beautifully, Not leaving even the smallest of details. The world fears everything it cannot understand. So when a person is different or tries to be what he wants to be, the world lacks the consideration to take out time and try to put itself in the person’s shoes. THE WORLD DOESN’T FUCKING UNDERSTAND!!

    But my friend, no man in history is remembered because he stopped doing what he wanted to just because the world was against him. A man is remembered for believing what he stands for. They’ll laugh at you, don’t give a fuck! They’ll mock you in your face, don’t give a fuck! They’ll stand against you, I say DO NOT GIVE A FLYING FUCK!! That’s how legends are made. Fuck the world my friend, and find the legend in you.

    Nice improvement in punctuation, but you can still better it. The writing is tight and compelling. Overall a good and captivating read. Thanks for posting.

    Regards.

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